Run Me Down

I’ve done it as well when I do something I know I’m in the wrong and I lash out at the other person. Its an interesting trait. I attribute it to a lack emotional intelligence. I’ve grown in most things. There are still something where I will be defensive… So I don’t resent this fellow I’m glad he didn’t run me over.
Foreignness is very hard.
I do forgive the person for not seeing me until the last minute and thankfully stopping before I was road kill. I’ve come to accept it when people react disparagingly or with disgust or revulsion at my disability. The innocent and ignorant are very forgivable. The insensitive ones on the other hand. God gave me a wicked sense of humor for a reason and its weapons free on these idiots. Not really I’ve mellowed and its not worth it. So I forgive these people to. Its O.K. to think the nasty thoughts though, isn’t it?
Its very hard to forgive myself. I still punish myself for being blind. I get embarrassed when I make mistakes. Even simple mistakes. I get ashamed of myself. I withdraw and retreat into myself. I need to withdraw from situations and regroup recover and forgive myself. The other night I forgot to use some left overs for dinner. I can’t see inside the refrigerator so if I forget about something its gone. It no longer exists. Out of site out of mind literally. The incident left me upset with myself and embarrassed. I needed to take care of me and breath through it. Realize we all make mistakes forgive myself and get on with life.
The devil is in the details and its still the small things that really hurt from time to time.