You Can’t Do ThaT

People love to tell us what we can and can’t do.  In some ways unfortunately we are shaped by our environment and those around us.     The people in our lives have a strong influence on what we think of ourselves and what we hold true about our abilities.   Look at a marriage with an abusive partner telling the other partner they wouldn’t be able to live without them.   Unfortunately we are handicapped by others disabilities or their lack of belief in themselves or abilities.   Ideally the ultimate situation would be where everyone is working for their own betterment while supporting those around them.

You Can’t Do ThaT Podcast

There have been many times in my life where I have been limited by those around me.   High school is one of those times where the herd is sorted and our futures are shaped.    Oh you don’t have what it takes to be a doctor and lawyer.   Oh you can only be a cowboy.  Bad paraphrase of a the song “Momma Don’t Let Your Babies Grow Up to Be Cowboys”.    I was filtered into the “special” group early.   In grade 9 I made the honor roll.  It’s amazing what a technical aid will do.   As soon as I started using a monocular my marks jumped 30% in all classes, except gym.    It’s amazing how much you learn by being able to see the black board.   But in grade 10 I was put in the “technical” stream not the “academic” stream.

It’s hard to perform when those around you tell you.  That’s all there is there ain’t no more to you.

Our friendships and our intimate relationships can also have this effect.   I’ve been in relationships where others want to help me out and do things for me.   It starts oh I know you can do it or could do it.   But it ultimately turns into you’re blind and can’t do so I have to do it for you and you’d be nothing without me.

A “friend” of mine had me over for dinner.    She made a profound difference in me.   Her hot water tank pilot light had gone out.  She let me light it for her.   It was one of the first times I felt like a man.   She is very special as my friendship with her provided that feedback to me often that I am a man!!!   Yes she lit my fire….

I have to say as an aside that I am truly attracted to those who stand up to their context, the people around them, and say.   Not today.  I can do it and I am worth it.

To this day I think it’s stupid how the system works.   Filter Filter Filter as appose to allowing us to build and grow on our strengths.    I ended up attending an adult high school after I graduated with my “technical” diploma and graduated with an “academic” diploma.

About the Author:

Kyle has ocular albinism and has been legally blind since birth. Kyle leads a very active live and is besides his professional career involved in many projects for persons who are different.

Post a Comment