Dating Disclosure

When do you disclose your disability with dating?

Dating Disclosure Podcast
The internet is cool.  I ran a study long ago far away to see the effects of technology on disabled people.  We hosted a service on a VAX 1178 that was essentially a bulletin board service allowing people to connect.   I moderated the service and ensured connections with people were made.  The ability of technology to totally level the playing field with people with disabilities was amazing.  There was no way to tell how a person was disabled period.   I interacted with deaf, blind, paraplegic, deaf blind people and people with other disabilities across Canada.  It was amazing!!

On-line dating is kind of like that.  The internet levels the playing field where how do you know who you are really talking to.   A friend of mine admits to using ten year old pictures when shall we say he was thinner and well younger.   What is the level of truth in their pictures and profile?    To me a profile is the brochure the marketing material.   I want to get to the specifications and manual as quickly as possible.   I can honestly tell you on my profile you’d never know I was blind.   Well you would only if you knew what to look for. Because if I disclosed on my profile no one would talk to me. Today someone disconnected entirely once I disclosed my disability.

The level of trust in the on-line dating process is interesting and is really managed through the connection process.  You have your pictures and profile.  Then you start to instant message or email.  Next you set up a coffee or lunch date then.  Well who knows…?    But all of this manages the trust in the development of a relationship.    I’m not going to get into the types of relationships other then the long term kind.  The rest is your problem if you’re looking for instant short term love.

I disclose my disability when the emails start to go back and forth.   A person’s character is paramount to me and I’ve decided I might as well let the cat out of the bag as soon as possible to filter quickly.   Why invest $40 bucks in lunch to find out someone doesn’t want to deal with the disability.    I figure a more or less free email will do the trick faster and easier and I’m not out $40.

Posted in: Dating

About the Author:

Kyle has ocular albinism and has been legally blind since birth. Kyle leads a very active live and is besides his professional career involved in many projects for persons who are different.

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